Aug 22, 2012

Why so "complicated"?

I recently happened to be talking to an old friend after a long time. Normally, when you talk to an old friend, catching up involves a little bit about school/college/work and a lot about the love life. Now the one thing about girls sharing their love life is that although they make it seem like something very confidential, it actually isn't. They will tell just about everyone who they come across. Show the slightest interest in a girl's love life and that will be enough to get her going for a good 2 hours. It's like saying that you wouldn't want to advertise something via an fb status, but you wouldn't mind sending an inbox message to everyone in your list.

The funny thing is that the length of any girl's love life does not vary with the number of relationships she's had. A girl with no boyfriend at all will also have plenty to say, which may involve how unfortunate she's been, or how she's afraid she's not a catch and she'll die alone, or how a lot of boys asked her out but she rejected them on the premises that they weren't really 'her type'. On the other hand a girl with 20 boyfriends will talk about what was wrong with each one of them and how she's sick of relationships and is never going to date anyone else ever again. It's such a cliche. We all know that isn't gonna happen!

But anyways, coming back, I started thinking about the logic behind all this. Why do romantic relationships have to be so complicated? They are actually just like any other relationship. The kind that you have with your family and friends. But yet, we spend so much more time analysing these kinds of relationships than any other. "I think he likes another girl", "I think he's losing interest in me". These are classic dialogues. Girls spend hours thinking over such things. Even the most subtle hints can throw her mind in the wrong direction. Things as simple as a guy having a long and light hearted conversation with another girl, or not having texted or called for two days.



If you really want to know, then why snoop around or take advice from hundreds of people or make a long heart felt story out of it. Just ask him! It's really simple, and extremely straightforward and will save you a very long phone bill and a lot of people's time.

Another classic trick that girls spend hours plotting is "ignoring the guy". It is a way of getting attention. I'm not saying that it isn't effective. It is. But then, "ignoring" someone can take more effort than you can imagine. Ignoring a guy involves constantly checking your phone to see if your little trick is working and if he is texting, wondering what you are upto and tracking his every move on facebook to see how he's taking your cold treatment. 

Jealousy is another big fat problem. And this comes from both sides of the enemy line. Boys are as jealous and possesive as girls are, if not more. When a guy sees his girlfriend or potential girlfriend within a 5 metre radius of another guy, he will immediately look for a girl to talk to as intimately as possible, so that they're both even. The girl, seeing that the guy is being all close and personal with another girl, will continue to talk to the guy she was hitherto talking to, apparently enjoying herself more than ever and laughing at the lamest jokes he makes. The guy seeing the girl having a good time with another guy, will return the favour. This is something that does not end. And it works the other way around.

And then we have the popular 'it's complicated' relationship status on facebook. I have never actually understood what that meant. Either you're dating or you're not. Sometimes, I feel that a 'it's complicated' status is simply a committed girl's effort to grab her boyfriend's attention or a single girl's effort to show that she has a life. It's hard to say. Most comments on any change of relationship statuses go unanswered. Most people's queries are generally answered by comments such as "i'll tell you when we talk next".
If you want to tell all your friends about your recently upturned love life one by one and not via facebook, why  bother changing your relationship status on facebook?
The people I think are actually sensible are the ones who also mention the name of the person they are dating. They're the ones who're accomplishing the purpose of putting up a facebook status. Although most people think it's a very abominable thing to do, I think it's better than people putting up a status followed by secretive comments which kind of nullify the purpose of using facebook.

Keeping it simple and not so complicated is much easier for everybody. Little tricks and insinuating comments are pretty much useless and a waste of time and energy. Imagine a world where everyone would just say what they thought and what they really mean to convey. It's kind of like putting an end to diplomacy!

Here's hoping you can unravel your life and make it a little less complicated! (And I really mean that) 



1 comment:

shubhdeep deb said...

its a really nice read !! :-)